64. The mutation of the Man
the end of the Art of Love
The morning was always so frozen.
She came in front of the Roshi and helped him to continue to empty the bag.
- From the time of your son of before, there were nuns here, in this monastery, asked Heidi.
- Yes, the Roshi answered… There were already few nuns before him… But with him, we have developed very advanced energetic techniques in « the Art of Love »… Thus we have increased the number of the women.
She smiles to all the possibilities which developed in her head.
- That was a success, she asked ?
He smiles him too.
- Yes… He has succeeded in developing a beautiful meeting between man and woman… and to show them how they could help each other to grow with their body of separated beings.
She testified to her interest by this remark:
- Thus he has succeeded in overcoming the first handicap of the separation, which is the end of the androgynous state and the presence of the man and the woman ?
He looked at her astonished by the depth of this remark.
- Yes, my son of before was a Great Master in this manner of using the tools resulting from the original separation and of making use of them to establish another union, he says proudly.
She took again the word in her own movement.
- Thus he used what was created to separate, in order to obtain a new union, hasn't he? she asked, captivated by the words of the old man.
The astonishment was confirmed on her face.
- Yes… He was a Great Master and he said that we don’t need to be afraid of the poison when we know the antidote.
- And he was a Great Master to discover antidotes, wasn’t he ?
- Yes… He was a Great Discoverer of Treasures! He says, the eyes beyond the crests.
- He has done a lot ?
- A lot…
The birds took again the power of the silence.
- Then, why he was tired to the point not to defend his life anymore ?
The Master changed his look on her.
- Because he is Major Yam! he says not content.
She followed his movement without being concerned with this gap of the Master.
- He thus needed the others to set up his « systems » and to develop his « treasures », hasn’t he ?
He returned to her. She appreciated well!
- And he was tired always to seek, to seek and still to seek bodies of Bam ready to be the space of reception for his action…
He often said: « When I leave, I will not have communicated to you the tenth of what I am able to show you… because I do not have ready bodies! »
Words of his Angel were coming back to her.
- It does not suffice to want… It is also necessary to be able, isn’t it ?
- Yes… It is necessary to be able…
He left his voice suspended and she did not break his rhythm.
- And when the basic structure curbs at the moment when it is less expected, we take a tumble, as he was used to say it with his incisive words, says the Master sad.
She laughed and asked :
- Then, what did he do ?
The Master liked the question and he smiled in his memory.
- His capacity to recover was incredible … To not accept the defeat… To find a solution… And he did it by giving again enthusiasm to the one who had failed!
She understood. She had had the same perception with her Angel.
- He was good, she says.
He looked at her surprised by these words.
- Yes… He loved the Men… And one said of him that he had the saber in one hand, but the bandage in the other…
He left his breath suspended, then he says:
- He never gave up… It was the others who separated from this Passion for Life… and who reproached him to no longer assisted them… to give them up.
- Then ?
- Then he said: « You have chosen!… I can do nothing for you in this territory in which you want to advance… Perhaps one day you will return on the Sure Earth, where there is nobody researching happiness and where the name of unhappiness does not exist »… And he also added: « You make your unhappiness and I cannot give you more energy so that you fall even more into your chasm… »
Silence was not anymore. The birds seized the power :
- Then he had developed the Art of Love, she says dreamy… But which one ?
The Master looked at her a long time. Her question testified to a great knowledge of the subject. He saw in her the traces of his son of now.
- There is initially the Art to touch a Woman and to give her happiness…and the confidence to be a woman, he says.
- Yes… and what else ?
- Then there is the Art to link energies and to do the Great Union… He has made a marvellous technique for that.
- A technique where the two coupled bodies found themselves back in the Source of this Universe ?
- Yes… But you seem to have a good knowledge of that, asked the Master… Did my son of now introduce you to this Art ?
- Yes… she says in the calm of the words which are endless.
The Roshi smiles. He was happy with this harmony between his son and her.
- Thus, he said to you and showed that the supreme Art of Love is the control of the penetration between Yam and Bam…
- Yes… Between the Heaven and the Earth, she says.
- Thus, he said to you that it is the Earth which orders the penetration.
- Yes… By its more or less large acceptance to agree to be penetrated, she says… He said and showed all that to me.
He ceased his words.
Then silence still broke with his breath.
- Then you are in the center of the Combat of this Universe, he declares.
- Yes… I am there in the center of the Combat, she confirmed.
Then he says in the sadness of the Heaven that we do not look at.
- Then you know that the Heaven cannot rap the Earth.
- Yes, I know…
Then he continued.
- It is this problem which is found in all the situations of the life: the control by Bam.
- Yes, I know that, says Heidi.
He showed his astonishment and his eyebrows were wrinkled.
- Then you know also what is the power of Bam on Yam!
- Yes, I know that.
- Then you understand the Challenge of my son of before, he says.
- Yes, I understand it… When it is this Door which opens in front of me.
He remained attentive to this answer of the young woman and he confirmed:
- Your structure is the one of the « Heart »… Then you understand thus! he says.
- Yes… I understand thus… And I would have liked to be there, in this monastery, in the days of your son of before, she says.
He returned for her in this time.
- Yes, he has broken open resistances of the basic structures by the Art of Love, he says, proud of his son.
She confirmed, as in a dream which belongs to her.
- He has taught them by their body how to open … To accept the deep penetration.
- Yes… He has done that.
She asked, but she knew the answer:
- And it was a success ?
He laughs, happy.
- It was imposing! … This monastery breathed with the freshness of the life and its enthusiasm!
Time did not have any more its dimension. The birds did not follow the one of the two beings in the room. Each one had his space of life and was not in each other’s way.
- Then why you have ceased after his departure ?
- He was the engine… he says.
She let these words slip and say their name.
- You had no more the desire to continue after… hadn’t you ?
He smiles in the sadness of the memory.
- No… It was him the Force of Imagination… I would have been only a tape recorder…
- This Knowledge is not in you, isn't it.
He spent some moment in silence because the question of the young woman was of importance and he wanted the words right according to the Creation.
- This knowledge is in me when I have learned it and have lived it in my body… But it is not in me as Fundamental Knowledge, he says.
However she raised the question to help him to discharge his bag.
- Why ?
- You know it well! … I am not Major Yam!
- Yes, she knew it.
- Then when Yam has left…
- It is as the Light which left with the lamp, he says.
- I know, she says.
Heidi followed the sorrow of the old man and helped him to finish his pain.
- Then, how that had continue ?
- I became the guardian of the place, said the Master.
Sadness took possession of the place.
- In which it happened nothing essential anymore ?
- Yes… Nothing essential! … Just to continue to direct the Family…
- And to decide specific actions to help the Kings and the Emperors.
Sadness became thick and prevented them from breathing at the bottom of their belly.
- Yes… We became a tool… We had lost our Creator, he says.
- And then ?
- I have waited… Waited… Waited… he says sad.
She followed the heart of the old man and cherished it.
- And your son of now came, she says.
- I was ready to give my life for him, he says.
Time broke its rhythm and an interrogation was born in the essential. Another flame of life pushed sadness outside.
- Then… What has blocked ? she asked.
- The body, he says.
- I do not understand ?
The Roshi took again a right back and a breathing in his belly.
- You know that the body of human is a condensation of the state of the energetic body of humanity, he says.
- Yes… You have again taught it to me these last days.
- Then through the bodies of human, it is possible to know the state of the energetic body of Humanity, he says.
- Yes… I understand that.
He let silence settle a long moment. He followed the discoveries of his son of now and his suffering.
- Then he wanted once more to die… because he had again recontacted this body since nearly twenty years… and he knew the vain combat against this Bam becoming so pretentious of itself.
She continued for him.
- And which does not give any more space of life and of action to the Carrier of Truth, does it ?
- You go too quickly on the life of this World, he says … You are still young.
- I do not understand, she says.
He spent some moment in silence once again. Then he says :
- The Truth of this World is not any more the Truth of Yam.
- I still do not understand.
The Master entered his deeper breathing to make resound the true words.
- This World is creating another Truth.
- But that is not possible!
He still made going up words from his center of life.
- Yes… It is possible… When one touches at the origin of life and that one finds the means of creating new beings starting from a cell…
- I do not understand, she confirmed.
- It is just a problem of culture and of information… Do not worry about lack of comprehension, he says.
He took again silence and then he says:
- Sophie had understood that… And her uncle too… And all those who helped them.
- The biology of the brain and the genetic ?
- Yes… It is that.
Then she took again her breath and a new discovery left her belly.
- It is for that your son of before took pains to do!
- Yes… They can change the World, confirmed the Roshi.
Heidi spent one moment in silence.
-I do not really understand… But I feel the importance of the words that you said and which resound in my belly.
The Roshi left time to retake again possession of time and he says:
- When one is able to reconstitute in laboratory a new human cell, from which the DNA chain will be reconstituted, one can program all the future of the human.
- Then there does not need the Intelligence of Yam anymore, she suffocated, in her very new comprehension.
- It is that, confirmed the Master… One does not need Him anymore since one will reconstitute another « better programmed » intelligence.
The young woman thinks.
- But they are mad! … The Laws of the Universe will react!
- Yes… But they do not know it! … And they do not have anymore the choice, said the Master… It is their only manner of trying to modify the evolution of the mankind which is on the slope of its asphyxia.
Heidi let the words fill her brain. She did not seek to control them. All became too complicated for her.
She preferred to remain with her heart.
Then she returned to her Angel and she says.
- He wanted to die…
- Yes… He wanted to die… And he has done like salmons… He went back to the source which had given him the previous life, says the Master.
- It means here… in this monastery?
- Yes… In this monastery…
- Why ?
The silence to return. The silence is always there in outside, but the interior silence is a great Art and words destroy it.
- I saved his previous life while making him going out of the river… He returned to the source to die again…
He left his words suspended and sadness was around him.
- Because for him, my « rescue » was an error… For him, I should have let him die…
He continued even more gently in his words.
- Then, he came to take again the thread where I had cut it, said the old man in a colossal pain which crushed his ribs.
She took also her time with her memories.
- Then you have felt him and you went to seek him… And me I have helped you to bring him back.
- Yes… And I gave you to him so that your strong body of the mountain gives him the desire for living again, he says.
- Then, where is the problem, she asked ?
The Roshi smiles with the sadness which increased in his ribs.
- He took possession of the energetic body of this monastery and he has perceived in it the same impossibility of moving my monks… as that had been with the ordinary men of the street…
- Then he was desperate once more ?
- Once more! … But I continued to have hope, he says.
- Why ?
He looked at her and she perceived in his eyes a tenderness for her which brought her back to her childhood, when her mother told her in the evening close to the fire « Come on my knees ».
- Because he loved you…and that you have a particularity which could only interested him, he says.
- Which one ?
- You are not interested to organize a quiet life on this Earth of the Men.
- Why ?
- Because you are already dead, he says gently.
For the young woman, it was a shock in the hollow of her belly and she fell on the floor, the arms around her as if she wanted to prevent her from leaving.
The old man looked at her and did not make a movement towards her. It was necessary that she remains alone with her suffering and her visions.
He knew that she saw again her brother who had taught her so much… She felt in her body the shock of the steel ends that the men call balls and which entered the body of her brother…
They were the same body in the suffering… But they had been also the same body in front of Confidence.
She howled with pain and twisted on the wood of the floor.
She remained a long time thus, huddled up. The Master stood up and covered her with a warm cover.
The night was there when she recovered consciousness of herself.
The Master says to her: « Rest in your bed… Come back tomorrow… I will tell the monks to bring you a burning soup and some tea and cakes… Go, my daughter of the Mountains of the North ».
She was there in the morning and she says to the Master:
- I made a dream tonight… There were Tong and my Angel. It was of such an intensity that it is engraved in my forehead and I would like to tell it to you.
The long monk advanced towards the young White sitting on the veranda of the pavilion. The slowness of his gestures, the contemplation of his eyes said the importance of the meeting. He sat down on his heels in front of Angel, as he was used to do it since months.
- I have a request, he says while looking at the young White straight in the eyes.
He did not await a confirmation. The light in the eyes of the one opposite was an invitation.
- How does one make to leave ?
The words shelled the ones after the others, in the same slowness as his breath coming from the belly.
- Of what do you want to leave ?
- Of this Universe, says the monk… I want to leave it… I have perceived all its imperfections and its primordial lie… I do not want any more to play its game with my body and to give it food…
- You know, says Angel… To leave is easy… But not to return anymore is very difficult…
- I think to have understood through all what you have said….That it is the dreams which make return in this Dimension.
- Yes, Angel blew… The dreams! …. But did you understand what are the dreams ?
- I think, says the monk… I think… They are all the hopes of modifications and nourishment of this Dimension…
- It is that… But are you aware of the importance and of the depth of the dreams, of these hopes ?…. I am not sure, articulated the young White gently.
He remained with the silence of the wind, then he says gently.
- The dream belongs to this universe, to this Bam… It is a creation of It… Not only the small music aside… It is the true music of Bam, the music of the enthusiasm to create something for this universe… To be used by It as food… To serve It… to subject ourself to It… To die for It…
Tong listened to him without a quivering of his body.
- Then, you see, my friend… It is not easy to be released from the dream because it is in the natural vibration of your cells… And I do not think that you would have gone deep enough in your observations to have understood all the implications of it.
- But then, how to do, asked the monk ?
- It is not to care about the dream anymore… Because it is included in each fiber of your body… The right thing to do is only to be « absorbed » by the death of the hope… What is not despair… but the non-hope…
Tong frowned… He started to understand.
- Thus it is this non-hope which will put an end to the dreams!
- It is that, says Angel… The dream cannot be destroyed since its mechanism is included in your meat when you come in this Dimension… But this dream is a hope to transform, to improve… It is the enthusiasm and the challenge of the new reincarnation! … It is when this hope is not any more, that the dream does not have any more a goal… And everything ceases by itself.
- You want to say that we do not have any more the dream, the hope that our departure can still be used for something for this humanity!
- It is that says Angel… No anymore hope… But no despair! … On the contrary, it develops an enormous enthusiasm to put an end to a lie…
-… Because we cannot stop this lie any more, continued the monk.
- You understand… You understand, smiles Angel.
Tong supported his smile and his eyes blazed.
- I feel this new Dimension in me! …. It is like a fire! …. But there is a huge love in this fire… It is the love for another thing that the body of humanity because that is higher to it… And that to help this Power, it is to help to the maintenance of the harmony of this Universe…
- It is that, says Angel… It is there that we testify if we like more the Creation, that the men who are destroying the normal movement of the Creation on this earth which was entrusted to them.
- I understand, says the monk. I think that I am ready.
- Do not think that, my friend… I must check if that is true in all the reflexes of your body… Because then « to leave » has no sense… since you will have « to return » to finish with your dreams and the primordial lie… And that in a world still worse than the one which is there! … Then it is better to continue to remain here, because you need your body to modify the space that you are.
Angel returned again in the silence of the wind, then he says.
- Even if that were… There would remain another question: Are you ready to be « Nothing » ?
- I do not understand, says the long monk.
Angel observed him and says:
- You want to leave Bam… But do you want to leave Yam ?
- I do not understand, repeated the monk.
Then Angel carried on:
- Major Yam, is an Intelligence… There is no body… No memory… No consciousness… But there is a bond with Bam because both of them make this Universe… Are you ready to go beyond Yam ?… Because without that, you will be automatically always connected to Bam… Perhaps without physical body, but always concerned with Bam to help it to live and to survive.
- I still do not understand your question, says the monk.
Angel spent some moment in silence.
- To be « nothing », it is to be nothing… You do not exist any more! …. No past… No future… No more consciousness that Tong has existed… No more Tong, never… Never! … Forever! … Are you ready to this complete inexistence ? …. To have no more future… Because you will not exist anymore as a being, as a consciousness! …. NOTHING more… Only elementary particles in the universe… A total dissolution!
Then he continued in the silence of the mountain.
- This wind on your skin, are you ready to never feel it again ? …. This sun on your body, are you ready to never feel it ?…. This water that you drink, are you ready to have never again the taste of it ? …. These looks of the others, your place among them, are you ready to never again have them…?
The wind rose and he followed it.
- And this wind which leads you, are you ready to never again have it like friend ?
Tong curved the nape of the neck and started to cry.
- You see that you are not even able to leave Bam!
But let us go now in Yam, he says.
- Are you ready to never have an action on the men ?…. To never create something new again ?…. Are you ready to cease any creation, to stop with Tong dependent on the earth of the men, on their movements, on their constructions… Are you ready to cease having enthusiasm to help the men, to see them creating, to see them procreating…
He let the wind return.
- Because after… There is nothing any more! …. No more consciousness, even that extraordinary of Yam… You have completely ceased existing… Are you ready to that ?
Tong lowered the head and his chin came on his chest.
- You see that you are not able to leave Yam!
Then the young man continued:
- You see, it is easy to say that we want to leave this world! …. And « WHO » wants ? …. The same pretentious Being as the one who wants to go in religion or to the brothel! …. Exactly the same one! ….
The wind continued to accompany him. The fury oozed by all his pores.
- Because it is still a lie to want to leave… To obtain one more sensation! …. To be made the « Master » of our existence! …. To enjoy this capacity to decide when we will leave the life! ….
He sighed and the wind entered his mouth.
- But what a surprised at the time of death! … This petty spirit is the first frightened that everything ceases for him… He did not want that! … He is as these children who dream that they die, that everybody around them cry them and say their regrets to have annoyed them… But which suddendly decides to return alive, the smile on the lips, as with a magic wand: « Here, I returned! … Now we can live « my requirements » together…!
His eyes were flames.
- But you see, there is nothing of all that in this departure… It is a complete departure without any return… But not only without return, but without any other existence… Finished! … Completely finished!
He closed the eyes and calmed his fury.
- Here it is, it is that to leave the Dimension of Major Yam, and not only from the Dimension of Bam because it is not dissociated from Yam. You cannot have one without the other… even if you do not make a new body in Bam! … You will remain then as energetic body in the intermediate space and you will try to influence the intelligences and the hearts which are in the physical bodies of Bam.
But you will continue to be in the same roundabout and always linked to the karma of Humanity and its future.
And you will be then surprised that suffering also exists in Yam.
Then he carried on:
- To enter the Dimension of this Force which creates everything, which decides everything ? … But there is « nobody » who creates, who decides… There is only one « indispensability » in the Order of the universe, because the universe is ordered and its Intelligence is self-sufficient… It has neither passed, nor future… Only one « requirement » of the moment!
The young White let dropped his last words:
- Then to want to enter this Dimension like a sugar refinery, like a liberation of this Universe, of this Bam, is as to want a suicide while believing that we will continue to direct the operations of the life that we leave… It is a madness!
- We need another motivation than that to leave this Universe and to enter Major Yam, then to leave it… Another impulse that this escape of Bam, that this will to stop with the men and their stupidities… We need another Heart that the one you know! ….
… So go with your question and do not come any more to disturb me with that. You are far from being ready… Continue to live your Bam until its suicidal limit… Then perhaps you will really understand and you will be ready.
The Master listened to her with an extreme attention. Then he asked:
- And you! … How have you lived this meeting ?
Heidi smiles. The Master understood!
- My Angel was with me, she says.
- And what has he said to you and shown, asked gently the Master with a voice of tenderness.
- He showed me my death, she says as gently as him not to disturb the Universe around them which listened to them.
Then they started to whisper by bringing closer their lips and their ears.
- Can you tell me ? asked the Master, almost timid.
- Yes, she blew… Let us approach even more. Our hearts are still too far.
She started and the Light took possession of the room while her words penetrated the space.
- I was present during the meeting between my Angel and Tong, sitting on the steps of the veranda. I perceived the fury of my Angel.
- Did you understand the reason of this fury, asked the Roshi ?
- Yes… It is that of the defeat, she says slowly.
- Of the defeat ?
- Yes… In front of him, Tong was the representation that my Angel could not act and give the full power of what he is… because the man is not ready, she says with the words which left her throat gently.
The Roshi remained quiet and asked.
- Can you tell me more on your comprehension of the moment ?
- It is like your son of before, says the young woman… He could not give his full power of his capacities and of his knowledge because he did not have bodies ready … I felt exactly the same disappointment and suffering in the words of my Angel.
The old man continued his interior meditation and asked again.
- Did you have the « feeling » that he was in anger because the man in general is not yet ready to leave the boat which sinks ?
- Yes… I think that we could formulate it thus… He was like a boat rescuer which awaits the shipwreck victim to help him, but the shipwreck victim is not yet aware of the shipwreck in which it is… she says with her soft words coming from her heart.
- Thus a boat rescuer which doesn't have employment ?
- More than that… Useless, she says…Yes! … Useless… It is that which I felt in the anger which grew in my Angel… Uselessness.
- And you ?… Who were you in this dream, asked the old man.
- I was there… Quite simply there… I was not of the Dimension of Tong… He was not any more my friend… I did not know him any more… I did not recognize anything in him able to touch me… And I was in the suffering of my Angel… It was as if I were part of his heart and I felt his beats in mine.
The Master kept silence some more breathings and asked:
- Tell me even more… Which is the true separation between you and Tong in this dream.
The young woman took her also her breathings and she says, the look on her heart.
- It was about death… It was about the death… Tong was not dead… He did not understand the death that my Angel explained to him… It is that the difference between him and me and that we do not know each other any more.
- You want to say that you, you know what is death ?
- More than that, Master… I am dead! … That was an obviousness, a state of being without interrogation on this subject… Death and me were together… There was no separation… It is that, we were the same Dimension and we understood together what my Angel said, as words which were ours.
The Roshi let pass the birds which took a lot of space. Then he whispered:
- It is that the achievement!
She does not say anything. She was in what occurred after the departure of Tong and she forgot the old man.
But her mouth opened and the little old man collected her movements in the hollow of his ear against the lips of the young girl.
« Come close to me, he says »
She came against her shoulder leaning against the wood of the palisade.
Separation did not exist. The thought did not have a place.
He let the birds and the wind to leave and in the silence of everything, he says:
« It is Time for you to measure your saber with the saber of the Life »
« The one of the Master ? »
« No, the one of the ordinary life, of people in the street »
« I leave the monastery ? »
« It is a place of learning and of training… Not a place of Life »
« Then I leave »
These words did not have resonance in the emotional. They gave the truth which was there and the young woman was not surprised by them. The fear of the unknown did not have any room there.
« It is the life of the every day with ordinary beings which will provide you the maturing of your death. »
« Yes »
« You will have the first double as aid »
These words followed also the movement of the truth.
« Then your physical death will come naturally when you succeed in crossing Yam with the second double like vessel. »
« Yes »
« You will meet there the two principal Powers of Yam: Uprightness and Lucidity… They will guide you »
« I do not know it » she heard herself to answer, without anguish, without concern… Just a precision.
« Like the first which you did not know! … And you will know the second in the same way when you create the external conditions for its indispensability »
« It is me who must create ? »
« You know that well! … You receive from the Universe what you have succeeded in moving in It. »
« Yes, I know that… We are alone to move… There is no Father! …
She remained one moment in silence of her words, then she continued:
« They are thus the natural forces of the ordinary life which will place me under these conditions ? »
« Yes… Only them have this power because the Life is there, not in a monastery »
« And you ? » she asked.
« You know well that I am Nothing… I do not exist »
« Yes, I know it now »
Her shoulder entered his shoulder and she knew that she was him.
Happiness to be alone ran in her heart and her body sparkled with enthusiasm at the beginning of this last voyage.
The next morning, the door of the monastery opened pushed by two monks braced themselves against the heavy jambs.
All the monks were there. The Master had wanted it thus.
- Go, my daughter of the Mountains of the North… The true life is in front of you, says the Roshi while accompanying her until the limit of the courtyard.
When she passed the gate, she looked back and says to them with a strong voice:
- Do remember! … The one who wants to keep his life will lose it!
The path swallowed her thin silhouette with the rucksack.
She did not look backwards. They had ceased existing.